Where the light is

well i stand outside in the smoky bar....drinking rain so slow.... and the light are flickering red and green... but i crave cold to black....and the night is swallow me up....watch me down and so...all i want is to be free from the mind which trouble me ...my only friend... is draft on the left and mojito on my right ... if i break up or even bend...i sacrifice who i ever been...im i still the same... all the blame are always fall on me...well im incomplete... so i move around all the puddle special over my feet... my emotion have no bound...and i weep to keep me from drowning down...im so tired from living the way i do.... something got to give.... but im longed to life....who said i was falling... it aint my fault?...no....really?